I must admit that the past couple of weeks have been a struggle for me, and I daresay millions of American women. I have alternately been deeply frightened, livid with anger, sad and depressed. I have been left with a feeling of deep helplessness and hopelessness in the face of this war on women.
Although the Supreme Court’s decision is not yet final, it will take a miracle of major proportions for Roe v. Wade to stand. It feels like a gut punch, and I don’t know what to do with all the feelings that are coming up for me. We are going back to the dark ages when women had no agency over their own lives, and it is a terrifying step backwards. As women on a spiritual path, what are we to do with these feelings as we watch our human rights being taken away?
The truth is, I don’t know. The great spiritual teachers say to let our feelings flow through us, to sit with them, and allow them their full range, even when it isn’t comfortable. We are to be love and radiate love, even to those who are our enemies.
Right now, that is an extremely difficult thing to do. I don’t feel like radiating love. I am angry. Because of a mostly old white men, women will die. Intelligent women, strong women. Women who have much to contribute to society. Women and children, men and families will be doomed to lives of poverty and deprivation because they can’t afford another child or because a single sixteen-year-old mom will not have the resources to further her education. With no exceptions for rape or incest, children will be forced to bear children and women will have to deal with the emotional trauma of assault for the rest of their lives. And that is just the beginning. It is a disaster of major proportions for all women and the men who love them.
I used to think that the spiritual and political could be separate, but I no longer believe that it is possible. I cannot be silent in the face of what is happening politically. If I don’t speak out, I am complicit in the deaths of women. Because making abortion illegal will not end abortion, it will only end safe abortions.
Which leads me back to the question of what do we, who are on a spiritual path, do with these difficult feelings? There are several things that I am doing that might be helpful to you.
I am feeling my feelings. I am allowing them to flow through me. I am not ignoring them, stuffing them, or denying them. I am then allowing those feelings to inform my actions.
I am taking action, even if it feels hopeless. Even little things help me to feel like I am doing something. I am writing letters to my legislators. I am marching for women’s rights. I am giving money to organizations dedicated to women’s rights. I am praying, particularly for those who are in power, the very ones that I am angry with.
I am speaking up when I can. I recently had a conversation with a friend where I respectfully pointed out some ramifications that she had not thought about. It may not have changed her mind, but the conversation opened up some new things to think about.
I am trying to be love. When I truly follow the path of love, it leads me to consider the best possible life for the greatest number of people. The path of love values the life of a fully grown woman over the life of a clump of unformed cells. The path of love treats a woman as a whole person, not a womb or a vessel. The path of love supports children and families after a child is born. And, as difficult as it is, I am doing my best to send love to those I see as the perpetrators of this assault on women.
5. I realize that I can only do what I can do. This is not going to be solved quickly, maybe not even in my lifetime. I must be prepared to deal with all the difficult feelings that will continue to arise as I do my best to make a difference in whatever small way that I can.
My stance on this issue may not be your stance. However, it will take all of us – feeling, acting, praying, speaking out, and trying to make some small difference, for love to eventually win out. Blessings as you walk your path.
Women’s March – Austin, Texas, October 2, 2021 My Right as a Woman I marched in the Women’s March on Saturday. It was incredibly inspiring to stand shoulder to shoulder with thousands of women (and the men who support them) who believe […]
I marched in the Women’s March on Saturday. It was incredibly inspiring to stand shoulder to shoulder with thousands of women (and the men who support them) who believe in the right to control their own bodies. There were all ages, grandmothers like me, small daughters, and everything in between. All races and genders stood together to demand the right to bodily autonomy. As woman after woman bravely stood and talked about choice and reproductive freedom, I was inspired to be braver. I was inspired to speak my truth more clearly and openly.
Here in Texas, I am surrounded by so called pro-life Republicans. Many of the people I know are deeply religious, and they are unable to see the irony on being pro-life just until a child is born. If they were truly pro-life, then it should matter to them what happens to a child after birth, not just while it is in the womb. It should matter to them that there is poverty and hunger and racism and child abuse.
It should matter that the life, physical health, and mental health of a fully grown woman, not to mention a 12- or 13-year-old victim of rape or incest, might be at stake if she is forced to bear a child. They are unable to see that forcing a woman to bear a child can, in itself, be life threatening. They fail to see that abortion is also health care.
Statistically it is more dangerous in the US for a woman to carry a child to term than to have an abortion (20.1 deaths per 100,000 vs .44 deaths per 100,000 respectively). The US leads the developed world in maternal mortality, and Texas is number 42 in the country with 34.5 deaths per 100,000. That puts Texas behind countries like Uzbekistan – 29 per 100,000; Malaysia – 29; Armenia- 26; Turkmenistan – 7; and United Arab Emirates – 3.
I am not criticizing anyone’s deeply held religious beliefs. I just don’t want those beliefs to infringe on my own or any other woman’s bodily autonomy. When a woman, in the eyes of the law, becomes just a vessel to bear children, she is no longer an independently functioning human being with rights of her own. In the eyes of the State, she becomes a second-class citizen. When she is not allowed to make her own fundamental health decisions, she in essence becomes a ward of the State. She is no longer free. A friend shared a very practical treatise, not on the morality of abortion, but on the legality and constitutionality of the laws that have recently been passed. Even if you have already read this, it is worth a second read.
Patriarchy has long held that women are the property of men. It has only been a few short years since women have been allowed basic rights long held by men. For example sex discrimination in employment was prohibited in 1964; the right of married couples to use contraception was upheld in 1965; no fault divorce was instituted in California in 1969; Title IX was passed in 1972 and prohibited sex discrimination in sports; Roe v Wade was upheld in 1973, allowing women the right to legal abortion; housing and credit discrimination was only ended in 1974; and states were no longer allowed to exclude women from serving on juries in 1975. It seemed that women were well on their way to being allowed the autonomy that is the right of every human being.
However, there is a patriarchal backlash to all these recent freedoms. The enormous push to take away a woman’s right to her own body has gained more momentum, and in less than 50 years, we are on the verge of once again becoming victims of the State in regard to pregnancy. Even more chilling is the idea that anyone can sue a woman or anyone who might help her get an abortion. This not only takes away a woman’s autonomy but also incentivizes someone to spy on women and helpers alike. Naziism anyone?
The same people who scream about a mask mandate taking away their freedoms are forcing women to endure (life-altering at best and life-threatening at worst) nine months of pregnancy and a lifetime of responsibility. Should it not be our decisions to make as female human beings? I am well past childbearing age, but I want my granddaughters to have the same rights as I did. I want future generations of women to have agency over their own bodies and the ability to make decisions about childbearing that are right for them and their families. It is not the job of government to control our uteruses. It is our own right and our own responsibility.
I know that not everyone who reads this will agree with me. However, I am hoping that it will foster an understanding of why I and thousands of others believe that it is the woman’s right to choose.
