Being and Doing

After a year of isolation, things are beginning to move back to the pre-Covid normal. People are cautiously meeting in person.  Calendars are filling, and busyness is once again becoming the norm.

I must admit that I am one of the incredibly privileged ones. I am retired. I don’t have to worry about keeping or losing a job, working from home with small children in the house, keeping a roof over my head, having food on the table, or any other of the huge challenges presented by a pandemic.  For that I am extremely grateful.

During the last year, it was easy for me to shift into a cocooning mode. As an introvert, I welcomed the time at home and shifted to practices designed to cultivate my inner self. Writing, meditation, art, long zoom talks with friends – these things became my pandemic norm and fed my soul. It’s not that I didn’t miss in-person interaction, but I welcomed the slower pace and the shift in focus.

Now, as things begin to shift once more, I am moving toward a busier schedule and less time for those life-affirming practices which have sustained me over the past year. I am realizing that I don’t want to lose those practices which encouraged my own inner growth.

So what is the balance between being and doing? Our society rewards doing rather than being. Productivity, growth, hard work, overtime – these are what the American work ethic values and rewards. My dilemma is how to find a balance between the masculine value of doing and the feminine value of being.

I have been retired for a long time, but I have filled my retirement with busyness and doing. I have worked hard to prove my worth in many, worthy volunteer endeavors. My identity is wrapped up in those endeavors. I am seen as a hard worker and a contributor to the community. I am rewarded with recognition and gratitude. I feel guilty if I am not giving back. But who am I when I am not doing for others?

This Covid year I have been able to have both an inner and an outer life. However, as things move back to what we call “normal,” I can see myself getting caught up again in the outer world and neglecting the inner world. I can see myself being lured back into the doing while longing for the groundedness of being.

The key for me is found in the rootedness of the feminine way of being. When my roots go deep and I know who I am at the core, I can easily move from being to doing to being. I am balanced and whole. I can act in the world because I am grounded in the sacred. I can give my energy to the outer world and then replenish myself with my sacred practices. My challenge, then is to continue the practice of being, while doing the things which bring me joy in the outer world.

We lived for a few years in the Pacific Northwest. It is a beautiful place, lush and green because of all the rain that falls. The Douglas fir trees grow to stunning heights and are incredibly beautiful. However, because there is so much rain, their root systems are shallow. They are not deeply rooted into the ground. When a strong wind blows, these magnificent trees can easily be blown over.

So it is with humans. In the world of doing, we can be seen as wonderfully giving and altruistic. We can be praised for all that we have accomplished. If our roots don’t go deep enough, however, any adversity can topple us and send us into a tailspin. Without deep roots, we can easily fall into depression and burnout.

My challenge to myself is to remember that those practices which sustain my inner world are as important as those actions which help others in the outer world, that losing myself in creating a painting or a blog is as important as volunteering for an event.  I must remember that being in my inner world helps to change the outer world.

My purpose then is to be so deeply rooted into the ground of being, that I am my true authentic self in every moment, whether I am producing in the outer world or daydreaming with my toes in the grass. My purpose is to be content in each moment, to welcome each experience, to see myself as worthy, (whether or not I am doing something in the outer world), to bring the balance of yin and yang to everything in my life.

What helps you to balance your inner and outer life, to balance the being and the doing?