Tag: Openness

Who Is My Brother?

In this crazy world where hate seems to gain more traction every day, why is it so hard to love one another?

July 16, 2023

Tagged acceptance, Brotherly love, Openness, soul

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I have been thinking a lot about my brother who passed away suddenly in 2014. He was my only sibling, and I still miss him deeply. He was the kind of person that was a friend to everyone. He never met a stranger, and always had a joke to share. He would go out of his way to help his friends, or strangers, and he asked for nothing in return. There was standing room only at his funeral because of the influence he had on his teacher colleagues and on the youth he coached and taught.

At his funeral we played the song, “He Ain’t Heavy, He’s My Brother, “by the Hollies, because my brother exemplified the words of the song in so many ways. He was a true brother to anyone who needed him, and he never considered that giving a hand up was a burden.

A line from that song has been stuck in my head for days. It says, “If I’m laden at all, I’m laden with sadness that everyone’s heart isn’t filled with the gladness of love for one another.” In this crazy world where hate seems to gain more traction every day, why is it so hard to love one another? Why can’t I see myself in the eyes of everyone I meet? Why is it so hard to understand that we are made of the same cosmic dust and that we are all one?

For too long, patriarchal religion has been the religion of duality – right, wrong; black, white; male, female; good, evil. I judge and am judged by where I land on the spectrum between the extremes of each polarity. My ego becomes the arbiter of who is right and who is wrong, who is worthy and who is unworthy based on a set of values and internal rules that I have absorbed through religion and culture. I decide if my brother is worthy of being carried. I decide to love or not love based on a criterion that I may not even be conscious of.

What if I quit judging and saw everyone as my brother or sister? What if, instead of judging someone’s actions, I could look into their eyes and see a fellow soul on its own unique journey? What if my heart could fill with gladness because I could freely and unequivocally love that other person? What if I could freely and unequivocally love myself?

The real burden for all of us lies in not being able to truly see the soul of another and to love that soul no matter what. The real burden lies in carrying a set of rules in my head about who or who is not worthy of love. I want my heart to be “filled with the gladness of love for one another,” and to do that I must look at others as well as myself through the eyes of love.

My brother was not perfect, but he was open, loving, and accepting. He saw everyone as his brother and was willing to help them bear their burdens without judging whether or not they were worthy. He set an example for me and others that I hope to emulate.

In loving memory of Chris Byler, brother to all.

Barbara Garland
July, 2023

The link to the lyrics:
https://www.google.com/search?q=lyrics+to+he+ain%27t+heavy&rlz=1C1CHBF_enUS959US959&oq=lyrics+to+he+ain%27t+heavy&aqs=chrome

When Does the Spiritual Become Political?

Choosing Love

“Choose. The single clenched fist lifted and ready, or the open hand, held out and waiting. Choose: For we meet by one or the other.” — Carl Sandburg

Goddess Inspired

May 13, 2023
2 Comments on Choosing Love

Tagged Choice, love, Openness

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“Choose. The single clenched fist lifted and ready, or the open hand, held out and waiting. Choose: For we meet by one or the other.” — Carl Sandburg

I am a part of my Rotary Club’s Racial Unity and Peacebuilding Committee, and one of my tasks each week is to find a quote for our closing Minute for Peace. Over the past two and a half years, I have collected many quotes from famous and not so famous people about building a more peaceful society. At the heart of all of these quotes is the foundation of love. Without love, there is no peace.

One of my readers last week questioned where the love is in this topsy-turvy world. If we watch any news at all, we see mass shootings, increased hate crimes, domestic abuse, child abuse, racism, sexism, otherism, and war. There is so much meanness in the world that many of us are filled with despair. We want to make a difference, but the problems seem overwhelming. How does our little act of love make any kind of dent in the crushing problems of the world, especially when greed, power, and control are what seem to be the main motivators of many of our leaders.

As Carl Sandburg said in the opening quote, we must choose between the open hand or the clenched fist. In my own life, I must choose either love and hope or fear and despair. At this point, love is all I have to fall back on because I am helpless to do much else. I don’t have the power to change things on the world stage, but I do have the power to change myself and to make a difference in my own sphere of influence. Every time that I do something in love, it changes the person or institution to which that love was directed. The change may be small, but it is not inconsequential. I believe with all my heart that that little bit of love does ripple out into the world and will help bring the world to a tipping point that will change the paradigm from one of hate, power, and control to that of love, acceptance, and connection.

For my part, I choose the open hand of love. I do not want to live in fear, hate, and despair. I choose to make a difference in whatever small way I can – to volunteer my time, talent, and treasure to bring peace and love into my corner of the world. I choose to associate myself with others who also choose the way of love. I choose to answer hate with love. Do I always succeed, NO. But as I become more conscious, it becomes easier to choose the loving, open hand rather than the hateful, closed fist.

Barbara Garland
May 2023

In Gratitude

Today feels like a day for gratitude!

Goddess Inspired

March 12, 2023

Tagged connection, Gratitude, Openness, Thankfulness

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For the moon that caresses with her silver light
For stars twinkling in the blackness of space
For the warmth of the sun which makes all life possible

For the greening grass
For the budding trees
For tulips, daffodils, and hyacinths blooming in wild profusion

For the deer and wild turkey which make my yard their home
For the fox, the possum, racoon, armadillo
For all the creatures which bring balance to the world

For birds greeting the dawn with sweet song
For cardinals flashing red, blue jays diving, wrens hopping
For owl, hawk, and crow – calling me to pay attention

For wild and still waters, rivers and lakes
For cool, refreshing, life-giving rain
For clean water flowing abundantly from the tap

For the peacefulness of my home
For the convenience of electricity
For creature comforts like beds and sofas

For food that nourishes
For clothes that cover me
For shelter that protects me

For those who love me
For family, friends, even pets
For all those who offer love, laughter, and joy

For God/dess who lives within
For her guidance and comfort
For her wisdom and love

For all these things and more
I am grateful
Everyday and in every way.

Barbara Garland
March, 2023

Community

What I can do is to open my heart, to listen, to learn, and to try to find common ground with an ever-wider circle of people who aren’t exactly like me. I can channel as much love as possible to anyone I label as other and allow my heart to be softened in understanding, empathy, and compassion.

Goddess Inspired

April 22, 2022

Tagged Common Goals, Community, Flexibility, Openness

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Community

Usually, I don’t have any problem finding a subject about which to blog. However, for the past couple of weeks nothing has come to mind. I decided to trust God/dess and draw an Oracle card. The first card I drew, I didn’t like. I reshuffled and drew again. God/dess must be laughing because I drew the same card on the second draw – Community.

It seems that now, more than ever, we all need to feel that we are part of a community. I like the definition of community as “a feeling of fellowship with others, as a result of sharing common attitudes, interests, and goals.’ However, there seems to be very few common interests or goals in this fractured world.

I see so much hate and division spewing out into the world. I will admit that I find myself pointing fingers at the folks who are on the opposite side of my own values. I label them as other and find fault in everything they say. I see them as the enemy and the problem. If only they would change their ways, then the world would be a better place.

I struggle with the concept of including those who aren’t like me, those whose values are radically different from my values. Although I am supposed to love everyone, how am I supposed to love the murderer, the child abuser, the rapist, the one who clearly doesn’t act out of love? Am I projecting my own shadow self onto that person, or are they truly evil?

No doubt, many of us are struggling with that question, and I certainly don’t have the answer. However, part of the issue is that I make my community too small. I only want to include those in my community who think exactly like I think, who share exactly the same values and the same outlook. I exclude those that I label other. I keep a tight little circle around me where I feel safe and comfortable, where I won’t have to look at my own shortcomings.

What if I could see those who don’t think like I do through the eyes of love? What if I could listen with an open heart to what they think and believe? What if I could love them as an extension of myself. What if I could dialogue with them to find common ground, to discover our shared humanity? What if I could understand the underlying fears that make them act as they do?

We as humans have more commonalities than differences. Instead of being pitted against each other in unassailable silos, is it possible to find common goals and interests. Can we come together to solve problems together as the world community?

I do believe that there is evil and there are evil people in the world. Those are not necessarily the people I am concerned with. I can’t change their hearts or minds. What I can do is to open my heart, to listen, to learn, and to try to find common ground with an ever-wider circle of people who aren’t exactly like me. I can channel as much love as possible to anyone I label as other and allow my heart to be softened in understanding, empathy, and compassion.

The Rhythm of Now

I must trust that each moment is exactly what it should be. I must be present in each moment and recognize that it is the only moment I have. I call this state, the rhythm of now.

Goddess Inspired

February 11, 2022

Tagged Creativity, Flow, Living in the Moment, NOW, Openness

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The Rhythm of Now

I come from a long line of worriers. Growing up, I lived in a household of four generations of women. My great grandmother, my grandmother, and my mother all worried about everything. They had survived a world in war, the great depression, hunger, and loss. They were not people of means, and I am sure that all of those things contributed to worry and sleepless nights. So it is only natural that I am a worrier too, although not to the same degree.

During my meditation practices this week, the oracle cards that have kept coming up for me are ones that keep pointing out the idea of flow. There is ebb and flow, being in flow, trusting the flow, creative flow. Ultimately, they all point out to me how important it is to just allow life – in all its contradictions, its quirkiness, its uncertainties – to flow around me. I must trust that each moment is exactly what it should be. I must be present in each moment and recognize that it is the only moment that I have. I call this state, the rhythm of now.

If I am fearful and anxious about the future, I am wasting the moment that I am living in. If I am focused on or regretful about the past, I am also wasting this very moment. My task is to focus on the here and the now and to allow the flow of moments to wash over me without judgment. My task is to be fully present as each moment unfolds, to allow whatever feelings I am experiencing to flow through me without identifying with those feelings.

If I am in the here and now, I am in flow with the universe. I am fully present. I am not in a state of worry. I am not missing out on the now because I am focused on the past or the future. I can fully appreciate the things of the here and now – the beauty of the sky, the scent of a flower, the joy of a hug, or conversely the pain in my joints, or the loneliness of being misunderstood. How I respond to these moments will determine my future because they are all about how I approach life. Is it with love and appreciation for each moment or is it in fear and mistrust based on past wounds or a frightening future?

As I put my focus on each moment, I am fully experiencing life in all its wonder. I am allowing life to flow, and I am an active participant in that flow. It is in that flow that co-creation with Goddess can happen. It is in that flow, the rhythm of now, that life at its best can happen. It is also in that flow that I can trust that I am held and safe. Whatever is going on around me is a part of a much bigger and grander picture. Even in the difficult times of life, there is an ebb and flow. I can find beauty in the dark times as well as the light times if I stay in the rhythm of now. While being in the rhythm of now may not change what is going on the wider world, it changes how I perceive the world and allows me to savor my life instead of worrying about the past or the future.

Barbara Garland
February 11, 2022

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New blogs will be added to this post every Friday.

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About Me

I am a seeker of truth, a truth teller, a lover of the Divine Feminine, an aspiring writer, a mystery, an open book, a work in progress. I have lived a long and varied life, and now in my seventies, I am being called to share some of what I have learned over the years. I hope to share the wisdom of the deep Feminine that is being channeled through me.

If the Goddess has ever whispered to you, I invite you to join me on an incredible journey of love and discovery. May you hear Her wisdom through these words.

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