I continue work with the idea of being enough, just as I am. I don’t have to do anything to be loved. I am loved by virtue of being created by the Divine. I am loved because I exist. It is reasonable to assume that a creator loves her creations, so I am loved just as the trees, flowers, rocks, rivers, and animals are loved. I am a fellow creature in creation and am loved and cared for with a Divine all-encompassing love. I am held in that love, no matter what I do or don’t do.
It is a comforting thought – that I don’t have to do anything to be held in love. I don’t have to earn my way or even be good to be loved by the Divine. I am enough just as I am. However, the perfectionist in me still tries to measure my worth by what I do. What am I doing to make the world a better place? How much am I contributing? Doesn’t the Divine love me a little more because I am doing good in the world? Intellectually knowing that I am enough doesn’t always translate into the way I live my life. Because I live in a society where my worth is based on what I do, how much I acquire, and what I produce, it is not always easy to remember that I am loved by virtue of my existence.
In my meditation this week I heard, “You are enough. While you don’t have to do anything to be loved, what you do can either spread more light and compassion into the world or it can spread more darkness. It is up to you.”
I can choose, but whether I choose to spread light or darkness doesn’t change the fact that I am loved. As a parent, I love my children fiercely. No matter what they do, I will always love them. However I may not always like what they do. They have a choice as to how they will conduct their lives, just as I have a choice as to how I will conduct mine. I will love them because they are my children, just as the Divine loves me because I am Her child.
God/dess has an even greater capacity for love than I do as a human parent. I can always be assured that no matter what mistakes I make, I am still held in that deep, abiding, and compassionate love. I am enough. It is my choice as to how I will spend my time. What I do can either spread light or darkness. How I am in my being state can do the same.
I choose to put my time and energy into sending love and light into the world. I choose to spend my time, talent, and treasure on causes that make a difference. I choose to practice sending love to everyone I encounter. As an elder, I can envision a time when I will no longer be able to do anything, but I hope that I have the cognitive ability and the spiritual muscle to continue to radiate love and compassion to those around me. Because I am loved, I choose to share that love with the world.
Barbara Garland
March, 2023