Tag: Forgiveness

Making Space

It is one thing to clean out a closet, it is quite another to clean out our emotional body. How do I begin to let go of things of which I may not even be aware, things that might not even be from this life? While I think I may have let go of the past, are there still things in my life that I need to release in order to become more fully who I am meant to be?

Goddess Inspired

December 11, 2020

Tagged Clearing out, Forgiveness, Letting Go, Making Space

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Making Space

I have lived in my house for eleven years, the longest I have ever lived anywhere. During that time my once-neat spaces have been filled with unnecessary stuff. There is no longer any room. When I open the closet or cabinet doors, I can’t find what I need. My pantry and my closets, to put it kindly, are haphazard and chaotic. They are filled to overflowing with bits and pieces that either don’t belong or are unnecessary. In order to make room for the things I need now, I must purge that which is no longer needed.

It is an apt analogy for welcoming 2021. For many of us, this year has been a roller coaster of negative emotions – fear, uncertainty, anger, frustration, disconnection. And that is just from 2020. There are many more emotions and memories left over from the rest of our lives, maybe even past lives. All of these many emotions are housed in our bodies, and they really want to stay there. But if we keep these leftovers, there is no room for what 2021 might bring. Unless I clean out the closet, I don’t have room for anything new. Unless I clear my spiritual and emotional spaces of the negative emotions from the past, I have no room to grow into what is being called forth from me.

While I don’t pretend to have all the answers, there are a few practices that have been incredibly freeing for me, especially when I do the work on a consistent basis.

1. Having a daily spiritual practice

Prayer, meditation, journaling, creative practices like art or writing, walks in nature – it doesn’t matter as much what you do as that you do it on a consistent basis. Setting aside a quiet time just for you to be in communion with spirit is essential to clearing out the old stuff stored in your body. I am grateful to 2020 for giving me the time to engage in a daily practice.

2. Engaging in meaningful ritual

It is important to invite your soul and the Divine into a sacred space of communion. A meaningful ritual that opens the sacred space sets the stage for communication between yourself and the Holy. It might be as simple as lighting a candle and playing soft music or it might involve a more complicated ritual. Whatever you do, it should be something that invites you to center into stillness.

3. Using spiritual tools

Spirit speaks to us in metaphor and symbols. We don’t usually hear the voice of the divine in a literal way. Spiritual tools like walking the labyrinth, meditation, journaling, collaging, or making art or music can open a channel to the divine and help us to make sense of the symbols that we are seeing.

4. Changing perception

When I am struggling, it is sometimes helpful to reframe a thought or event. When I can see that someone who hurt me was acting out of their own pain and suffering rather than deliberately trying to hurt me, it is easier to forgive and let go of the hurt.

5. Practicing gratitude

When I am grateful for everything in my life, even things that don’t seem to be so wonderful, I am living in alignment with what Spirit brings. If I can be grateful in every moment, I am more apt to learn from my experiences. When I am in gratitude mode, I don’t embody negative energies because I really don’t see them as negative. I see them as opportunities for growth.

6. Being aware of your body

We have been taught to ignore our bodies, but it is our bodies which hold on to the blockages. When you are using your spiritual tools or when you are in communion with Spirit, be aware of the places in your body where you feel blocked. What aches? What feels tense? What feels closed off? As you focus on your body, you can begin to lovingly release those old patterns.

7. Listening to your intuition

What is that still small voice inside of you telling you? What is your body telling you? What is that animal that suddenly showed up on your path telling you? What are your dreams telling you? Look and listen and be open to the signs and wonders all around you. Allow those wonders to speak to your spirit and listen to what they have to say.

8. Finding support

Many of us no longer find mainstream religious communities helpful, but there is a vast network of spiritually minded people connected on the web. There are dozens of offerings and groups that you can join (some free and some not) to receive support in this amazing journey. The offerings can be overwhelming, so be discerning and choose one or two which feel right to you. Sometimes there is a whole network, sometimes there is one person, but there are places where you can find support, including on this site.

As you begin to pay attention, to have a daily practice, to be open to what Spirit is trying to say, to practice gratitude, the things that no longer serve you will begin to fall away or they will be integrated and transmuted into a totally new part of you. You will have more and more space – space for wholeness, integration, communion, and being the radiant being who you were meant to be. So join me in cleaning out those negative emotional spaces in our bodies and get ready to welcome the new year with lightness and ease.

Barbara Garland
December 11, 2020

When Does the Spiritual Become Political?

Forgiveness

Whether or not you believe in past lives or the Divine Feminine, as 2020 becomes a page in history, how will forgiveness help you grow? Who and what do you need to forgive, in order to meet 2021 and fulfill your own unique role in the year to come?

Goddess Inspired

December 4, 2020
2 Comments on Forgiveness

Tagged Forgiveness, Letting Go, Patriarchy, Power, Space

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Forgiveness

In looking back over 2020 and in preparation for 2021, I am examining the concept of forgiveness. (Thank you, to Janet Connor and participants of the Lotus and the Lily Intensive.) It is important to begin this new year by shedding that which no longer serves and by letting go of old hurts.

To start the process, I looked up the dictionary meaning of forgiveness. The psychological definition is that forgiveness is “a conscious, deliberate decision to release feelings of resentment or vengeance toward a person or group who has harmed you, whether or not they actually deserve your forgiveness.”

But why should I forgive? What does forgiveness do to help me be more whole? The way that I understand it, forgiving another gives me back my power. If I am focused on the wrong that has been done to me by another, I am giving power over to that person every time that I think of them. I am allowing that person and whatever they have done to do it over again whenever I rehash the incident. If I forgive (not condone) and move on, I take back my power.

Forgiveness opens me up. When I forgive, I also create a new space that I can fill with things that are both helpful and healing. Thoughts of revenge or rehashing old wounds don’t leave room for other things. Letting go and forgiving will clear spaces in my Soul for other more life-affirming things.

The reasons then for bestowing forgiveness are to claim my own power and to create space for things which affirm life. Which leads me back to the question – “who do I need to forgive?’

Next week, I will turn 72 years old. That may seem like a long time, but in reality, the last fifty years have flown by. In my lifetime, I have been hurt many times. Parents, teachers, lovers, spouses, children, friends, and enemies, even God – everyone in my life has hurt me or has had the potential to hurt me, sometimes intentionally, but more often inadvertently. The more emotionally entangled with someone I am, the greater potential they have to cause pain.

Looking back, I do believe that I have forgiven the people in this present life, even those who have hurt me the most. I no longer think about hurtful incidents, nor do I give any thought to revenge or to the past actions of those people who have hurt me (some of whom are no longer in my life). I have chosen to let go and let be. Have I condoned what was done – NO! But I have let go and no longer expend any energy nursing old wounds or rehashing old stories.

In fact, I have found gifts in many of those old wounds. Those wounds spurred me to grow, in ways that wouldn’t have happened otherwise. I can even be grateful to the perpetrators, many of whom pushed me out of old patterns and forced me to examine my life.

As I look at who and what I need to forgive, an amazing insight keeps rattling in my brain: not only do I need to forgive people in this life, I also need to forgive people from past lives. This became very clear to me one night this week.

I was in that liminal state between sleeping and wakefulness. In that dreamy state, I kept hearing the words, “All those men.” My body literally began to shake, and I wanted to weep. I thought about my past lives as a warrior/priestess that have been revealed to me. Of course! In those lives I had been tortured, killed, raped, burned, and betrayed by “all those men” because I was in service to the Goddess. No wonder I am furious when I read about what has been done to women over the centuries. No wonder I am angry when I see injustices toward women and marginalized people.

So how do I forgive those nameless, faceless ghosts? How do I forgive the Patriarchy that drove them? How do I forgive the God in whose name they destroyed me and thousands of other peaceful women (and men) who loved the earth and who followed the sacred ways of the Goddess?

I think that I must remember that forgiving is neither condoning nor forgetting. Forgiving is letting go of the hold (even though it is an unconscious hold) that the old stories have on my psyche, and which still continue to resonate in my body and strike fear in my heart. Forgiving is reclaiming my power and my voice as warrior/priestess and doing whatever I can in this life to break the power of the Patriarchy. As the old Patriarchal institutions die, I must be ready to help forge new ways of being, based on the premise that all life, not just human life, is sacred and holy.

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New blogs will be added to this post every Friday.

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About Me

I am a seeker of truth, a truth teller, a lover of the Divine Feminine, an aspiring writer, a mystery, an open book, a work in progress. I have lived a long and varied life, and now in my seventies, I am being called to share some of what I have learned over the years. I hope to share the wisdom of the deep Feminine that is being channeled through me.

If the Goddess has ever whispered to you, I invite you to join me on an incredible journey of love and discovery. May you hear Her wisdom through these words.

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