Patriarchy Must Die

This week has been devastating for women in our country. Knowing that our bodies are seen by the patriarchy as expendable and as gestational vessels only is a heavy burden to carry. Although we have always known on some level that our hard-won freedoms were fragile, to see in black and white that we are soon to lose our freedom of choice has been deeply troubling and devastating for me.

I am not here to debate the morality of abortion. I believe that abortion should be a decision made between a woman, her doctor, and her higher power. Rather, I am here to say once again that Patriarchy, as the ruling structure of most societies world-wide, must end.

In most world religions, God is seen as male, and in our country, a white male. Everything else flows from that premise. From that premise a patriarchal hierarchy is born with white men at the top, white men who are determined to keep their power and rule with an iron fist. Women are seen as evil, less than, child-like, incapable of making the most basic of decisions. People of color or other-gendered people are seen as even lower than white women.

I believe that patriarchy is the cause of most of society’s ills. In a system where most of the rules are made by white men, misogyny, racism, and homophobia, are accepted as normal. We are so steeped in a patriarchal world view that most of us cannot see it for what it is, a system designed to keep rich white men in power and everyone else repressed and powerless. It is a system that denigrates and humiliates, that rapes and pillages, that stacks the deck against anyone who is not white and male.

Patriarchy, as a system, uses “power over” to control, exploit, and to subjugate those which are not at the top of the power structure, namely high-status men (usually white men). These men control the laws, both secular and religious. They control the money. They control anyone and anything that they perceive as lower status. They are addicted to power and status and terrified that they will lose that power.

To keep the “other” in line, laws are codified into religion and culture. These control every aspect of someone’s life – marriage, education, property rights, bodily autonomy. Just look at the current culture wars over abortion and gay marriage to see patriarchy in action. Look at war around the world to see patriarchy at work.

When women have bodily autonomy, when they can choose when or if to have children, they are no longer under the thumb of patriarchy or the male god in the sky. That is too threatening to a patriarchal system, and the backlash is here. After over fifty years, women are going to lose agency over their own bodies. But patriarchy will not stop there; it will continue to erode our rights and take us back into the dark ages. It is a small step from losing the right to choose, to ultimately becoming a man’s property with no rights of our own.

And it isn’t just women who suffer. Men already suffer greatly from the exaggerated toxic masculinity that denies them the expression of their deepest emotions, that values toughness and stoicism over anything perceived as feminine. As climate degradation accelerates, the whole world, including humans and non-humans suffer.  Anyone who is perceived as “other” suffers.

Today, I have no idea how to deal with my own deep sadness as I see what is happening in the world, particularly to women. I see some hope, as women and men around the world are opening to the wisdom of the Divine Feminine. They are marching, they are speaking out, they are opening to and speaking about another, better way. This way will not be a matriarchy replacing the patriarchy. It is rather a way of being that values love above all else. It is a way of being where power within replaces power over. It is not concerned with more, better, stronger, or status. It is a system that truly cares about life in all its forms. It will contain the balance of the best of both masculine and feminine.

We are at a turning point that will lead us to a better world or to destruction. I hope it is not too late for us, our children and grandchildren, to open to a way that will leave patriarchy in the dust and open us up to freedom and justice for all.

Barbara Garland
May, 2022