I don’t know about you, but in these chaotic times, I have a very hard time sending love to those people who appear to delight in spreading hate and divisiveness into the world.  I see their lust for power, their greed, and their appalling hypocrisy, and the last thing I want to do is to try to love them.

Matthieu Ricard is an ordained Buddhist monk and French translator for the Dalai Lama. Recently, in an interview for the New York Times, Ricard talked about the concept of compassion. As I read the article I began to understand more fully that compassion might be an even more powerful tool than love. According to Ricard,

“Because this [compassion] is different from moral judgment. It doesn’t prevent you from saying that those are walking psychopaths, that they have no heart. But compassion is to remedy suffering wherever it is, whatever form it takes and whoever causes it. So what is the object of compassion here? It is the hatred and the person under its power. If someone beats you with a stick, you don’t get angry with the stick — you get angry with the person. These people we are talking about are like sticks in the hands of ignorance and hatred (emphasis mine). We can judge the acts of a person at a particular time, but compassion is wishing that the present aspect of suffering and the causes of suffering may be remedied.”

As I read that paragraph it suddenly became clearer that despising the acts of a person is different than hating that person. While I always knew this in my head, I have struggled with the concept as I work to grow spiritually. However, when I think of having compassion for those whom I see as evil, I am more able to send love in their direction. For example, if I can picture Vladimir Putin or Donald Trump as hurt little boys, I can feel love and compassion for the wounded child within them that causes them to do the terrible things they do. I can be more empathetic because I can see the causes of their suffering. It doesn’t excuse their acts, but it helps me to move away from hatred and loathing to a more understanding stance. It helps me to realize that they do what they do because they are suffering.

Compassion then opens me up to empathy and love. It allows me to understand that suffering is what motivates me to do the things I do whether or not I am conscious of that suffering. When I act unconsciously, I am trying to assuage the suffering that I may have carried for lifetimes. When I understand my own motivations, I can then empathize with the motivations of others. I can still abhor those acts that are immoral and repugnant, while at the same time recognizing the inner suffering that causes a person to do what they do. I can then direct love and compassion to the suffering that is at the root of the behavior.

My prayer today then is to be filled with compassion toward whatever causes suffering in me and in others.

Barbara Garland
August, 2023